It's been a week since this post was supposed to be published so hopefully my mind serves me in recalling the night of 23rd January 2009.
I was from some pro-bono work I was doing, filled to the brim after having a late supper with Hejaz and Rafi, then later joined by Abs, Alia and Zin (names changed to protect the innocent). Hanging out brings many an insight and also some laughter, something I haven't had for ages at that time, given the fact that I was in a somewhat self-mending period.
Then Abs was telling us how she would always attract men that would only want her for bodily pleasure, if you get what I mean. Then Zin said or rather asked something that really was jaw dropping.
What goes through your mind when you look at men?
Then Abs went on about how sexy they were and basically their physique was the first thing that appealed to her.
So it was about sexual attractiveness? Did you see something beyond that was attractive about that guy?
I noticed she was kinda getting where Zin was going and before she answered (to my recollection!) Zin said...
You know, we're energy. People are energy. You are like a magnet that attracts what kind of frame of mind you are at the time. So it's really crucial that your state of mind has to reflect the kind of person you want to attract in order to find your SOULMATE.
In all my years of coaching and reading self help books it never dawned upon me to think like this. Well usually I do but on a theoretical level. Not something that I was rigorously catching myself with. I knew at one point I was sourcing for the love supreme and yet I have the tendency to think of whether I had chemistry with the other person before I went into a relationship.
And that was always first, they had to fit a certain physical template in order to pass my relationship requirements. And not to mention the ooohs and aaahs when someone hot passes by. No wonder I get annoying men that do the same.
But do you get where I'm getting at? it's about you changing the way you think about a person. I mean by all means if sexual attraction is all that you're looking for then by all means go for it because that's what you will end up with in the end but if it's commitment and a loving relationship that you desire then you better shift the way you think and feel about people.
It's also stated in the Quran Al-Ghashiyah...Something about partners and the point was that you are who you attract. Good with good, evil with evil. Again another opportunity for you to make a conscious choice, good or evil. What's it gonna be?
I remember a friend of mine once told me, in order for something to happen you need to be in CREATION. You can't sit idly and wait for the moon and sun to fall on your lap. You have the power to change your destiny. So you want love CREATE it, BE it.
For instance if you want openness in your relationship, you have to first BE open. Say whatever you need to say and just take that risk. It never hurts to tell the truth, because at the end of the day that's what serves the relationship, and I'm assuming that is what you would want in return?
Just take it as how Confuscious says it, Treat others how you want yourself to be treated.
Have fun and explore this. Discover new things about yourself. You never know unless you try. Never stop risking, they may say agree to you and they may not. Don't give up. It's just the Universe or whoever superior being you pray to is working on towards giving you the best out of life. Don't sell out on yourself and be complacent.
WHAT I LIVE BY
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.