I told my friend I wanted to journal my happenings in the next 30 days of Ramadan. So here goes.
I don't know how I'm going to start it but I'll make it better as I go along.
Yesterday was kind of a stretch for me I must say, being the first day and all.
I couldn't help but want to swear every other time.
I had this lady who took over me on the way to Al-Andalus to break fast with my friends and it drove me insane. I wanted to wave her the finger (I would have tossed my shoes at her and showed her both my middle toes to if it didn't boggle the physical plains of reality and question the sanity of the mind too much-my mind)
Instead I took a deep breath and braved through the next hour in silence and inner reflection.
It made me take a look at my mistakes. Yes........what a time to be reflecting. Half an hour to break fast and in a tight jam (I think that highways do it to me a lot).
I realized I don't show my appreciation to those that matter a lot (a certain someone). *sighs*..Real heavy price to pay for enlightenment especially when you love that someone that much.
I haven't quite figured out though why I haven't gotten over that certain someone yet. It's pure torture especially when I love being in control of my situation and happenings.
Jazzy told me there's always a reason, and I remembered Erin say, when the sun is still not out you can always dance in the rain. Metaphorically been dancing in the rain too long that saying my skin's prune-y would be an understatement.
Good news is career is on a healthy front and health is awesome too. Would be better if I had more money and was fitter though.
Like Oprah rich and Giselle fit.
Never the less, I'm grateful.
WHAT I LIVE BY
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.